Happy Tuesday TV fans! When looking back on season 8 of Shameless, I have to admit that one of my absolute favorite characters is Svetlana, played by the fabulous and beautiful Isidora Goreshter. While the main story-lines of season 8 focused around most of the Gallagher family, one cannot discount Svetlana. Without even trying, she is absolutely hilarious and unapologetic for who she is. She is smart and powerful, but ultimately she just wants to be able to live the “American Dream.” While Kev and V initially team up against her, they eventually put their efforts toward helping Svetlana get married.
For today, I am going to be recapping and ranking the top 5 moments featuring Svetlana from season 8. Whether she was demonstrating basic math skills, kidnapping “bottom feeders,” or hilariously asking about the actual point of smiling, Svetlana steals the spotlight and one can’t help rooting for her. Please note spoilers are ahead if you have not gotten a chance to watch the full season yet. My top 5 moments featuring Svetlana from Shameless season 8 are:
Svetlana is ready to teach us basic math. (Moment from Season 8, episode 5)
In episode 5, Svetlana is back and is ready to teach us basic math. It is great to see Svetlana back in the bar, but she is immediately ready for business and explains to V that profit should be 50/50 even though there are three parties involved. V is not about to give up so easily, but Svetlana explains that she does the majority of the work and even shows her numbers that prove she makes the majority of the money during her shift.
When V is still not ready to budge, Svetlana decides to get her to sign the contract with her terms another way…with sex of course. V is no match for Svetlana at this point and ultimately signs the contract. Kev’s shock about what happened combined with detailed questions is hilarious as Svetlana proudly walks out of the house holding the contract. 50/50 wins after all. And who said you can’t put your math skills to good use?
Svetlana gets an unexpected visitor. (Moment from Season 8, episode 9)
V decides that Kev’s newfound dominance could best be used to convince Svetlana to wear a new dress code, which he enforces to her enjoyment. “Dominance…boom.” Even though Svetlana is covering up her “tatas,” she still rocks some seriously fashionable glasses.
Svetlana gets an unexpected visit from a woman she had helped smuggle into the country, which she previously referred to as a “bottom feeder,” only to get a slap of reality, realizing that the “bottom feeder” now has the American Dream she so desperately wanted. Svetlana is horrified at her own circumstances, wondering if she made the right choices for herself. Svetlana is not about to let anyone step on her, however.
Kev and V try to coach Svetlana on how to secure a rich husband. (Moment from Season 8, episode 10)
After setting up an online profile for Svetlana, Kev and V are horrified by her actions on her first date, which involve an outfit mostly covered in fish-net and ending in a punch in the face. Kev and V try to “coach” Svetlana on “etiquette” and how to behave on a date, suggesting smiling as an easy first step. Svetlana asks, “What is the point of smiling?” not falling for the bait.
Kev and V realize that their best hope of finding Svetlana a rich husband is to have her wear a microphone and earpiece so Kev can talk her through what to say. Svetlana seems reluctant at first, but Kev reminds her that “this is spy shit. It’s in your DNA!” After the code words fail and Kev realizes he forgot to test the microphone, he is still confident that his words of wisdom will help Svetlana. However, Svetlana takes off her ear piece and goes back to what she knows best…grabbing the man’s “goods” and seeing where this will take them.
Svetlana tries to humble herself. (Moment from Season 8, episode 11)
In this episode, Kev and V are still invested in finding Svetlana a millionaire of her own. Svetlana even writes down all of her skills on a napkin to prove her worth, after taking her friends out to a fancy hotel bar to find a man. Kev is excited when he gets approached, but learns it is not for Svetlana, but for the “chocolate one.” After explaining that V is his wife, the man offers to pay him $4000 for an hour with V, which even V is considering at this point. After all they do have bills to pay.
Security explains that they have a strict “no prostitute policy,” and Svetlana comes to the epiphany that she needs to humble herself and go talk to the Russian “bottom feeder.” After her rival spits on an expensive gown in front of her and tells her that she would rather throw it out than give it to her, Svetlana realizes that she is getting nowhere. However, when the billionaire mistakes Svetlana for his bride to be in his old age, she realizes that all may not be lost after all.
At the end of the episode, Svetlana drags a body bag into the bar and tells Kev and V that she is not dead yet with a glowing smile of victory. One should never underestimate Svetlana and I am rooting for her to finally obtain the “American Dream.”
Svetlana gets married. (Moment from Season 8, episode 12)
Svetlana’s plan seems to be going well when she kidnaps her former Russian friend, Frelania and keeps her held hostage at Kev and V’s home. After realizing that she has the chance to successfully steal her husband and obtain the American Dream of becoming a rich trophy wife, there is no stopping her. I mean priorities, right? Kev and V are on board to help her and Kev fully embraces his new role as the “father of the bride.” However, when Svetlana explains that if Frelania “tries anything you cut her face,” he is a little hesitant to put the machete to use.
Svetlana explains that the next part of their plan involves keeping Frelania’s mother, Zlata distracted, as she is the only person who will be able to recognize Svetlana at the wedding. Kev hilariously dresses up as a chauffeur, complete with ripped sleeves underneath the suit jacket, and displays a sign at the airport reading, “Zlata…super long last name” with an arrow. Zlata is known to have a “taste for human flesh,” so Kev and V decide to try out her appetite for vodka to keep her as far away from the wedding as possible.
Everything seems to be going seamlessly when Svetlana walks down the aisle in a gorgeous wedding gown, only for Kev to find out that there is a Prenup. Just as he reveals this to V, Svetlana says “I do.” It looks like Kev and V’s plan was a success, as Svetlana is out of their lives, but hopefully she will find someway around this Prenup. After all, we know what measures Svetlana is willing to take to get her way.
While Shameless has been renewed for season 9, Isidora has commented that she is not coming back to the show. The character of Svetlana will be missed for sure. Isidora is beyond talented, as she was able to turn a minor character into one of the best on Shameless. Thanks for all of the laugh out loud moments, Svetlana!
I hope you enjoyed the list and feel free to post your own thoughts and favorite moments on Shameless in the comments section below. Thanks so much for reading and happy viewing!
Amy Koto, TV Fanatic Girl
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